STRUGGLES: This week has kind of been one of those weeks where feelings were all over the place. I think I started of the week just kind of going through the motions. I have been dealing with frustrations and fears about praying for the healing of Cooper's eyes. What if God doesn't plan to heal him? I know he wants me to share my heart, but what if I am to be disappointed in the end. On top of this everything came crashing down on Wednesday. It was just a bad day.
MUSINGS: I came home that day to a message from Cooper's former ECI caseworker asking me to call a mom who has a six-month old son with a similar visual diagnosis as Cooper. I really struggled with whether to call her or not. I did and when she returned my call, we talked for almost an hour. Tim and I really didn't know how God was going to use our experiences with Cooper, but I think we're just beginning one way.
REVELATIONS: I think this opportunity reaffirmed where I need to be. On Thursday, a good friend said something to me that really hurt my feelings at first. I know it wasn't intentional, but it still stung just a little. Within seconds of beginning to feel sorry for myself and feeling myself sink back to my teenage years with little self esteem, God spoke very clearly to me that HE validates my worth. Over the past few days, I've felt Satan sneak in with the idea of saying something to her - just to let her know it hurt my feelings - but I know that there is no need. I am LOVED.
This week's memory verse: "Some trust in chariots, some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God." Psalm 20:7
